Again
It's Inkhaven time. Again, I didn't apply. Probably I should have, but the future is hard to predict. Or not, but I forgot to try. I had some work things I wanted to get done before switching focus, and I got them done yesterday. Coincidentally, of course. And seasonal-depression-fogginess when the applications were open didn't help either. Only now after it lifted I got the energy to get bloodwork done to figure it out: Vitamin D3 deficiency. A well-known issue with a well-known solution, so typical of me. I guess it would have also felt silly to fly there now when I'm going to be at LessOnline in two months. The last time didn't go that well. It was miserable. But so are many other things that in retrospect are completely worth it. So... One thing I'm getting rid of is the 500 word thres
It's Inkhaven time. Again, I didn't apply. Probably I should have, but the future is hard to predict. Or not, but I forgot to try. I had some work things I wanted to get done before switching focus, and I got them done yesterday. Coincidentally, of course. And seasonal-depression-fogginess when the applications were open didn't help either. Only now after it lifted I got the energy to get bloodwork done to figure it out: Vitamin D3 deficiency. A well-known issue with a well-known solution, so typical of me. I guess it would have also felt silly to fly there now when I'm going to be at LessOnline in two months.
The last time didn't go that well. It was miserable. But so are many other things that in retrospect are completely worth it. So...
One thing I'm getting rid of is the 500 word threshold. As long as I publish something, anything, every day, I'm happy. I'll still aim for average of at least 500 words per day, but I won't be stressing it too much. Staring at word count wasn't healthy for me or the text quality.
I'll also try to treat this less as a commitment, and more as a hobby; once I stop feeling like this is a good idea I'll drop it. Even if that happens tomorrow, or on the 28th.
Quality-wise, some of the stuff last time was really bad. I'll probably publish it on my personal, unindexed blog instead. Or Twitter, that's the place for low-quality takes after all.
Last time, after I was done, my creative channels felt drained. I had nothing more to say. I barely had anything to say during the month. The topic-seeking process was quite forced. That's apparently a habit one can learn and train. Weeks after November many thoughts were still processed with a "what could I write about this"-flavor. That's the main source of improvement I identified. The actual text writing process, turning thoughts into words, also got a bit better, but that's way less noticeable.
I also feel like I've been through a character development arc or two after that. Perhaps there's something to reflect on? Perhaps not, tomorrow I'm back to dredging the mud of my mind desperate for anything resembling a coherent idea. But there's something to be said for smiling when walking into a certain defeat.
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